Monthly Archives: November 2011

Mind over Matter…

This is something I’ve been thinking about for awhile.  I’ve tried to write this post a few times… getting a few words down and then backspacing it all away.  Sometimes it’s hard to find the right words to express what you want to express…making it sound the way you want it to sound!  Sometimes you just have to put your fingers to the keyboard and go with it!

I have this spare room… remember when I gave you a tour of my house? Remember how it has one of these in it…. (have no fear my rooms aren’t blue…just was playing around in the photo editing!) Even when one of the bloggers I read announced a 6month Fitness Challenge starting October 15th, 2011 to April 15th, 2012…I signed up, made some goals… and guess what 1 month into it… I had visited the treadmill a total of 3 times in a period of 5 days-the first week and hadn’t been near it since…

Living up in the north there is no gym in my community… so I knew if I wanted to be active, particularly in the cold, dark days of winter… I should get myself a treadmill.  So I did.  I researched found one, was very excited… set it up… used it for a week. And then got sucked into that veggin’ on the couch watching mindless tv after work, and then hitting snooze a dozen more times…not getting out of bed in time to visit my spare room and the treadmill before work.

Does the idea of living a healthy life…and being physically fit matter to me? Yes, it does. There was a time in my life about 6 years ago..where I went to a gym really regularly.  Like at least 3 if not 4 times a week.  Working out with a trainer two times a week…and doing cardio on my own at least 2 other times a week on my own.  Boy did I get results… I put my mind to it.. and I just DID it.  Heading to the gym after work… not coming home until 7:30 or so.. long days yes, but I came to love working out.  I think one of the biggest obstacles is that I remember what my body then did, and how it performed… and I’m pissed off every time I go to work out that I didn’t keep it up.  I feel so out of shape and it’s brutal.

It’s not rocket-science, I know what to do… I know the exercises… I have friends that are currently doing amazing things, and facing their own personal demons and are way further on this journey than I am.  I find them inspirational and I wish I could too be just like them…(my brain says that yes, I can be like them) but still I sit on the couch or hit that snooze button morning after morning.

Tonight, after a friend on FB announced that they were going to the gym… and they’d talk later. I replied, “Oh me too.” But I started to cook dinner, and then ate dinner… all the while thinking.  What is the matter with me? How come I can’t make myself do what I know will make me feel better…and get me back into that shape I remember.  I didn’t have many answers for myself.  After about an hour and half of time wasting… I went to my bedroom put on a pair of shorts, a tank top and my socks…and headed into my spare room. I turned on my TV-it happened to be on Much Music’s Top Hit Count Down… the #2 Hit was on: LMFAO’s “Your sexy and you know it…” Now there’s some motivation if a girl ever needed it! …soon after pop-up videos started.  There I was… walking away, sweating up a storm… and suddenly this thought came over me.  I think part of my hang up in this journey is my fear of failure…I fear that if I actually TRY to do something like get better in shape, and then don’t succeed whose to blame? ME… and I don’t want to fail…so I don’t really put much effort into it.  Yep, smart thoughts…really sabatoging… you know what I thought? I thought SCREW that… I put my finger on the increase speed button.. and started to run.  I lasted at a running pace for a whole pop-up video song.. Katy Perry’s song “E.T.”!  YES, I ran for that WHOLE song… at a 5.0 pace…I honestly didn’t think I could do something like that, but I surprised myself, my legs remembered and my breathing struggled at first but I got my groove…I just have to work on my endurance!

Afterwards, as I put my pace back to a fast walk… I smiled to myself and said, “I CAN and WILL do this…” I guess it’s a matter of MIND over MATTER.  I need to stop the sabotaging mind games…and just do it.  I’m not going to say it’s going to be easy…or I’m going to get this done quickly.  I have a feeling every day will be a battle but it’s one I’m going to continue to fight!  And you know at the end of my 45mins on the treadmill today… I had jogged for a total of 5 times for 3-4mins each time!  I call that success… today I won.

…now that this particular fear or “elephant in the room” has been named maybe the rest of this journey will get easier.  It’s not something I’m going to talk regularly on here about…but I’ve set some goals(both long term and short term).

Short Term Goals: For the next 3 weeks before my vacation I’m going to walk on my treadmill at least 3 times a week., I’m going to have breakfast every morning, and drink more water–and less pop.  I also have other ‘long term’ goals I have written down..but for now I’m going to focus on the smaller ones that can be fulfilled in the next 3 weeks.

Dance Parties in the Kitchen…

A lot of people know I hate to cook…but well baking is a total different matter!  It’s something I LOVE to do!!!  I have a lot of memories of baking with my gramma and mum when I was young…My gramma makes the best Choc-Chip Cookies (until her cookie factory closed-she still has the sign at the cottage but rarely makes them!).  I remember helping bake birthday cakes, cookies and other goodies…then there were a few years I helped iced special cakes for my cousins!  (don’t look too closely at the cake I iced today, because I think my skills at 12years old are better than they are now at 31!)…Baking always interested me more than the cooking thing in the kitchen…but I have learned to cook a few dishes, because sadly you can’t just live on baked goodies!

When I talked about living in the north and returning…a lot of people’s first question is what do you do way up there for fun? Well… one fun way of getting through the cold and dark nights of the winter is to have dinner parties, potlucks, game nights etc!  I’m off to a friend’s dinner party…and am brining dessert!   So this morning I woke up fairly early for me on a Saturday morning (around 10:30am)…I made some breakfast.  Turned on my iPod…and started to prepare to bake…cookies and a cake!

The Christmas after moving into my first apartment in Toronto my God-daughter gave me for Christmas one year the “Better Homes and Gardens- special edition cookbook”.  That September I had walked in Toronto’s “Weekend to End Breast Cancer” (they have changed the name now) it was a 60km walk in 2 days!  This cookbook supported Breast Cancer research, so I think that’s why I ended up with it!  Honestly it’s been one of the BEST gifts I’ve ever gotten…it’s the BEST cookbook I’ve ever had!  Has the best recipes…for a lot of my cakes, cookies.  If I want to venture into cooking main courses it has anything you’d need to know about cooking meats and veggies!  I’d so recommend getting this cookbook to ANYONE starting out in their own house!

That’s was on of the first things I pulled out of the cupboards…I found the recipes for today….got my Kitchen Aid mixer set up… then I started on the mixing and baking….

Then I looked over to my kitchen sink… if you know me you know I HATE doing dishes!  I think the root of this dislike comes from the eczema I had as a kid (and still prone to outbreaks) added to the fact that my hands don’t really like the dish gloves either(and often would react to them, still do)… makes me NOT really wanting to do dishes EVER!  But when you live alone… it has to be done, well at least once and awhile!  So I headed over to the sink and did my dishes*…

* not all of the dishes were from today… most were from earlier this past week!

As I was doing the dishes I was putting cookies in and out of the oven… I must say my house now smells YUMMY!

I had so many cookies… I was even able to share with my neighbours and their kids!

As I was writing the last of the daylight has come…it got dark about 2:30pm today!  I’m glad I got up early and had my dance party in the kitchen with some baking on the side…just so I could enjoy the light!  Hope you are having a fantastic Saturday… I can’t wait to join friends tonight and have some cake!

Wordless Wednesday XI: Old Hudson’s Bay Blubber Station

Kinmount Shoe Trees…

On the May 24 weekend in 2010, I found myself driving along Hwy 45–a short cut  my way to Haliburton to visit family.  As I drove past the “Kinmount Shoe Trees” I said to my mum, “I NEED to take a photo of this!”… So I pulled over her car… and I stopped to take some photos of the “Kinmount Shoe Trees”.  I blogged about it HERE.

(I re-looked at my photos and re-edited some of them… and some of them that might not have made the blog originally)

I’m glad I trusted my instinct, seized the moments and took some photos…because the shoe trees have been taken down.  You can read about that on the Kinmount website. It was kind of neat to see on this page that they had linked to my ‘original’ post about the Kinmount Shoe Trees.  Thanks for the link love!

I guess the local city councilman felt they were ‘ugly’ and a ‘hazard’ along this ‘highway’ because people were always stopping alongside the road to add shoes or take photos. (on the day that I stopped I didn’t even see a car along the road for a good 20mins!)  I suppose those are very real reasons why to stop a tradition..but those excuses fall a bit ‘flat’…seems kind of harsh to take down something that is WELL known in your community!  Why not embrace the art-sculpture…and ask the if anyone in the community could help pick up garbage etc… why distroy something that won’t be there for the next generation? I suppose they were thinking that the tourists don’t need to see crazy shoes on a tree–that’s not what they leave the city for!

Through all of this I finally got my answer WHY the trees actually started along HWY 45… it is my hope that some of the ‘left-over’ shoelaces find their way to a new home and a new tree!

When I read about the trees being gone…I was sad.  A memory from from when I was a kid was gone, something I remember driving past as a kid wondering how all those shoes got there…and now it’s gone.  It got me thinking…

People might think that I deal fairly well with change.  I admit for someone that has lived in 2 provinces, 1 territory, another country, and countless numbers of cities & towns in the last 13 years…I do deal fairly well with change.  I’ve learned to adapt…but I have a secret that helps me adapt.  It’s the ability to come back to my ‘home-away-from-home’ that is also known as Haliburton.  Although sometimes these homecomings can be a bit bitter sweet.  Part of me still imagines that EVERYTHING will be the SAME when I return as it was when I left.  I left the Fall of 1998…I was a few months shy of my 19th birthday, excited to embark on my first adventures at university.  My mum was moving at the same time to another city… so I never got to return frequently on my university breaks-I ended up visiting my mum in the new city.  Sure I always managed to have a few visits at the Summer cottage, but it wasn’t the same as if you mum still lived in your home town.  I was so excited 3 summers ago when she got a job back in Haliburton and moved back!  That meant I did have a residence when I returned to Haliburton. But I will always be connected to Haliburton, you see I have family connections in Haliburton that go deep… and I’ve talked about the ‘family’ cottages on Haliburton Lake before.

Part of the reason I can travel is that I have my back-up my ‘home-away-from-home’ its a role Haliburton has always played for me and hopefully will always exist. Because of this I have branched out and created homes for myself wherever I happen to be living! But when I return to my ‘home-away-from-home’ sometimes I get sad when I see small changes around town.Or walk down the main street and say “Hi” to someone that doesn’t recognize me.  I also wonder what changes I’ll see when I return for Christmas in a few short weeks.  I know that changes have to happen…heck in the 13 years since I’ve not lived in Haliburton left I’ve changed as a person and grown–so only fitting should the town change too.  I know places evolve and get better. But this process is so hard for me, when I come back and notice that something’s different…a building has been left to decay…or a building has been gutted, parking lots have changed the IN and the OUT…(and I still can’t remember what the ‘new’ way is…).  I wish things could just STAND STILL and be just like it use to be!

Maybe part of me is worried that someday I’ll come back to my ‘home-away-from-home’ and I won’t recognize it…and it won’t recognize me…I’ll just be another summer tourist walking the main street, being talked about the ‘locals’!

Windy…but not crazy winds!

Well I’m back home… I just spent the last 24hours at a friends house. Thanks for your hospitality Morena and Nick… Yesterday morning when I woke up  I decided I didn’t want to be on the ‘windy’ side of town…in my townhouse during a storm if the winds were going to gust up to 150km/hr!

So I gathered together some food, clothes, camera and computer and headed downtown.  All day we were ‘waiting’ for the storm to hit… and the wind did blow, but not at the crazy as predicted. (Thank goodness)… I had a blast, playing play-dough…blocks and watching cartoons.  The power didn’t end up going off… so no glow-stick dance parties this time!

Though at times our internet connection was lost! The winds didn’t really get up to 150km/hr…but did get up to at least 68-70km/hr gusts (taken from the Environment Canada Website).  I was glad to be with friends…and not all alone wondering if my roof would fly off!

But me and my red shoes are safely at home…watching the snow fall outside.

 

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